Category Archives: On The Serious Side

Choosing to Not Give Up

How many times do we hear the old adage, “Never give up”? We see a friend who has lost hope after so many attempts, and our instant reaction is to probably say, “Hey, don’t give up!” Or perhaps we would blurt out: “Just don’t give up, keep on trying!” This reminds me of a half-joke we used to tell in school:

Try and try, until you die

Just do it, or die trying.

It seems so simple – that of not giving up – and yet it is probably the most difficult thing to do in our lives. It’s much easier said than done.

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Enlightenment

In the past couple of days I had the rare privilege of attending a kenshuu – the closest translation would be a seminar, I think, although they wouldn’t really call it that way (semina- refers to a different thing in Japanese).

It was a two-day “enkarejjing” (encouraging) kenshuu for women employees. I sat there, in rapt attention, listening to the brilliant resource person who handled the seminar, and tried my best in interacting with the women during our round-table discussions. I tried to absorb as much as my limited Japanese ability would allow.

In a word? Enlightening. I never realized until now that there are many women out there who are facing the same issues as I am, and who practically have the same concerns and anxieties as I do. I was like – wow, you’re a researcher too? And you have young children too? How do you manage to balance work and home? How supportive is your husband in all of these? I mean, these are issues that I never really get to talk about with my colleagues (for an obvious reason, mainly that I am the only woman there doing that kind of work).

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Reminiscing on Father’s Day

I have a lot of fond memories of my late Dad. Of course, not all memories are probably worth reminiscing, and if we had a choice, there are certain memories which we’d rather bury. But for me, those memories – good and bad – are made even more precious now that he is gone.

daddy lilet baguio 1976
Daddy and his pouty little girl. Trip to Baguio, 1976

If I were describe a specific memory with my Dad that is fondest to me, it would be the time when I got back from Baguio during the Holy Week of 1995. I was spending the Holy Week in Baguio with my Mom and cousin, but I had to make an emergency trip back because I went down with chickenpox. (I know, I know, I was a late bloomer!) Prior to the trip, Daddy and I were not on speaking terms because he had just found out about my relationship with Baggy. I kept it as a secret from the rest of my family because I was afraid that they would not be able to accept him. He was very mad at me, and he was really hurt because I had somehow “betrayed” his trust.

When Dad opened the door to our house that night when I arrived, he gave me that dagger look which sort of demanded, “What the heck are you doing here?

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Disturbing

By now the rest of the world has probably heard about the latest stabbing spree in Akihabara. It’s the very nature of the place, its popularity, that makes it worthy of worldwide attention. As of this writing, there have been seven confirmed dead. Supposedly killed by a man who indiscriminately stabbed people because he “was tired of life.” The suspect is only 25 years old.

This brings to mind another incident about two months ago. In almost the same manner, someone ran amuck ala Rambo at Arakawaoki Station (Joban line). So, no, it’s not as popular as Akihabara, and it didn’t get covered much except for the local news. But just the same, it was where 8 people were tragically killed stabbed at random by a man, and at least one person died. That station is just about five kilometers from where we live, but when that incident actually happened, we were just 5 minutes away from the station. When we heard the news, it sent shivers down our spines.

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Bitter Lessons

This week has been most peculiar. How could I describe it? Weird, strange, unusual, depressing, shocking. I’m still reeling from the unexpected turn of events.

I lost a friend. This song has been playing in my head for the past few days, and deep in my heart I wished that I knew how to save a life. If only I knew…

Quo Vadis, PhD Graduate? (Practical Advice to New PhDs in Japan)

It’s graduation season once again. To those who are completing their course requirements and who will be receiving their coveted degrees at the end of this month, congratulations! It’s time to relax and bask in the glory of your PhD. Bring out the champagne! Have a blast at karaoke! Give yourself that well-deserved break.

Someone wrote me a couple of weeks back, asking me for advice on how one should go about on choosing a postdoctoral position. As a PhD candidate, that person is naturally anxious on how to proceed next. It reminded me of how fraught with anxiety I was when I was nearing the completion of my degree. I was very relieved to know that I had endured and would soon be receiving the fruit of my labor. However, at the same, I couldn’t help but feel so confused. Where do I go next?

As a new PhD graduate, the choices that one makes can and will ultimately determine the fate of one’s career. Don’t even think that having a PhD is an end; rather, it is a beginning to a brand new adventure. The question is, how does one begin the long trek?

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Misconceptions

Sometime ago, I asked Aya if she knew exactly what kind of work we do. Turned out that she didn’t. So I told her: “We’re scientists. You know, I do experiments everyday, just like the experiments we do at home. Tatay does stuffs on the computer. We’re both hakase.” Hakase (??) refers to someone who holds a doctorate. Aya knows this word because she watches Powerpuff Girls on TV, so I thought I’d use the word to give her an idea. In the cartoon series, the girls refer to Prof. Utonium as “hakase.”

Aya laughed out loud and said: “Eh? Hakase si Tatay? Ikaw rin? Pano ka naging hakase eh babae ka?” (What? Dad is a PhD? And you too? How could you be one when you’re a woman?)

powerpuff-girls8Thanks a lot to the people who created Powerpuff Girls. You’ve inadvertently given my daughter the erroneous idea that for someone to be called Dr. or hakase, that someone has to be a man. But for now, I’ll reserve my rants about gender issues in another blog entry. 

I couldn’t forget that incident, because it illustrated perfectly how many of our misconceptions could start early on in our lives, no thanks to the crap that we are inevitably fed by the media, friends and families, the very environment we grow up in. The images we see on TV or movies are very powerful in influencing our perception of so many things. (Image taken from www.tv.com)

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Why I Love my (Old) Honda

I was walking back towards our office when I saw a BMW car pass by. I thought, wow, what a really nice car, I wonder who’s driving it? Must be one of the guys on the 9th floor (the powers that be, the ones who run this institute). Then I saw the driver. To my surprise, I recognized the person driving the car. It was one of the janitress whom I occasionally see walking around holding a bucketful of stuffs for cleaning.

130-3005_IMG Another car drove by, not as stunning as the BMW, but it looked fancy just the same. And just as I thought, I recognized the driver to be another janitress who cleans our toilet. Both of them probably just got off from work and were on their way home. I couldn’t help but smile to myself. In this country, the people who clean the toilets get to go home earlier than the rest of us schmucks, and they get to drive those fancy cars. Only in Japan.

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Winning and Losing

We face many battles in life. Sometimes we win; sometimes we lose. It’s a fact of life. Winning always brings a feeling of euphoria. Losing, which in reality is more than just an antithesis of winning, can be like an open wound that takes a long time to heal – if it heals at all.

But, as someone said, life goes on. Reluctantly we trudge on, and grin and bear it like everyone else.

finishline

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